Be Fearless

Lately I feel like I’ve been in a weird place in life. The gap between being content in life, and longing for something more. What does it mean to walk by faith? What does it mean to really live? What does it mean to be bold and fearless? What does it look like to be weak yet still strong?

These are all questions I’ve been struggling with for the past few months. As I sit in my comfortable apartment bed with my fluffy blankets and my scented candles, there are people just blocks away that experience pain, loss, and suffering over bigger issues than my own. That doesn’t mean we don’t deal with big stuff everyday, but on the contrary, it means that even though our pain may be minimal compared to others, God still treats it as his problem. He bends down to listen to those that cry out to him (Psalm 17:6). Yet, what does it mean to cry out? Is it that moment where we stand up for ourselves and say enough is enough? or is it the soft whisper that leaves our mouths when we are alone at night and can’t seem to deal with our pain in that moment? This year has been a tough transition year for a lot of people, including myself. My professors have pushed me to do bigger and better, I have had to balance working two jobs and going to school full time, and with time I have lost friendships and gained new ones. I have yearned for community, and have learned how to turn to God during my trials. Yet, somehow it hasn’t been enough. Maybe it’s because my heart simply wants to do everything in one lifetime. I want to travel the world and love on people that have never known what love looks like. I want to go to a different country and learn their culture and experience what it is like to live in the now. At times I also want to move back home and relive my childhood where everything was safe and secure. That doesn’t mean I’ll do all of those things because in the end only God knows where he’ll take me, but it means that he puts those desires in our hearts because he is a creative God. He gives us free will to choose him and to choose a life that overpasses any kind of understanding. I’m writing this to inspire myself and whoever else reads this.

YOU ARE IMPORTANT. YOU MATTER. NEVER STOP DREAMING.

Whether you say you don’t have time to do the things that are on your heart, or whether you are afraid to do the things that God put in your heart, I want you to know that you are not alone. Everyone has felt that way at some point in their lives. Where would we be if God never put the creative mentality in famous artists like Picasso, and Da Vinci? Where would the world be if Albert Einstein decided to listen to his teacher and never pursue his love for math? Where would we be if songwriters took rejection to heart and never wrote another song in their lives?  We wouldn’t have the best break up songs, and we wouldn’t have those songs that remind us of our loved ones.

BE FEARLESS, BE KIND, BE DIFFERENT.

As I’m currently in school for Film and Music, I have only ever heard from people “Good luck on making a name for yourself.” or “Good luck on making money, you should have a back up plan.” Every time I hear this I can’t help but smile and hope that they are living the life they always wanted. I hope that they go to bed smiling because they love their jobs so much they can’t wait to get up in the morning. I hope they pursued the dream they had when they were younger, because in the end it won’t matter how much money you had, or what kind of car you drove. The only thing that is going to matter is knowing that you lived a life filled with meaning and did something to further God’s kingdom. Whether it’s in film, medicine, photography, or teaching, God has a way with making the impossible happen.

 

Captivating

I recently took a few days off of social media to clear my mind and thoughts. It wasn’t until I had made my decision that I really noticed how many times I picked up my phone to check up on the several social apps that connect me with the world. Everyday I wake up and check my phone like it’s the morning paper. I scroll through countless styling blogs to get an inspiration for what to wear, how to look, where to eat, what to take pictures of, and what to post. That’s when it really hit me, it has become our crutch. Our constant source of energy to be accepted into this society that is measured in what we look like and how many followers we have. I’m not saying that social media is all bad, but I personally noticed how much time I spent on it as opposed to spending time with God, and it blew my mind. We have the access to a God that is all mighty and everlasting, a source of unconditional love, someone that endured more than we could every imagine, yet here we are idolizing our phones and our social lives. I personally tend to shove him away in the deepest corners of my mind until I break under stress and cry out to him for help. A cycle that repeats overtime my life is falling apart. Yet, he doesn’t mind. He stays and waits. Just like a father waits for his son or daughter to need him, he waits patiently. Longing for us but waiting till we cry out to him.

When did it become okay to hate the way we look like simply because we long to look like photoshopped models on the internet? When did it become okay to gossip and criticize others simply because of their social media? Even though it was a few days it radically shaped the way I engaged in on conversations, the way I noticed how many people struggle with the same addiction. Instead of scrolling through my newsfeed, I started to read books and books that I’d claim to never have time to read because “I was too busy”. Being offline helped me connect with the relationships around me.

“There is a radiance hidden in your Heart that the world desperately needs.” – Captivating

When I read this line I loved from the book Captivating, it spoke to me not only because of the beautiful words, or because it provides good inspiration, but I loved it because it gave me hope. We all have some radiance to give to the world. We are like stars shining amongst the darkest nights.  Just like there are countless galaxies far far away, there will always be stars. Some burn out and die, but they all have purpose and meaning. In the midst of our limitations God wants to show his power. He wants to help us through our temptations and trials. All it takes is to listen with an open heart and an open mind. Just like the sun rises in the east and sets in the west, there is hope for a new day. He gives us a promise for a brighter future.

When we allow our thoughts and mind to be controlled through the world, we begin to change the way we look at ourselves. God created us in His perfect image, therefore why are we not perfect in him too?

 

Home

 

Today I realized how hard it really is to live on your own. I never knew what a blessing it was to have a mother that does tea time with you each night, or a latin grandmother that cooks at all times of day, or to have a dog that greets you the moment you get home, or a warm and comfy household that feels like heaven during the winter. Today was hard because I missed all those things.  Maybe it’s the rainy weather, or maybe it’s the fact that college keeps getting harder and harder as the semesters pass preparing you for the scary reality that life holds.

“Today is the oldest you’ve ever been and the youngest you’ll ever be.”

I’ve always heard this phrase, but today It really stuck. Today as I watched The Zorro movies that helped remind me of my childhood living in Spain and cried over my extra big bucket of popcorn, I felt God comforting my heart and mind. It’s crazy to think that we are not alone. Sure we can’t always physically see God, but we can feel his sweet presence. I like to imagine him as a father bending over to hear the sorrows of his children and loving on them. He knows the desires of our hearts and longs to be in unity with us. He brings relationships into our lives to help ease the pain. People that can make our hearts smile even when we don’t feel like it. Friends that will spend money on expensive crepes and coffee with you late at night when you can’t sleep to make you feel better.

We should be lovers yet fearless in all that we do. So I choose courage. I choose courage even when all I want to do is hide away in my room. I choose to face the world and do my best because in the end that’s all that we can bring to the Father, our honesty and humility.

Roma / Rome

When in Rome

“Rome is built on ruins and is quite breathtaking; what makes you think you can’t be too?”

I stumbled upon this quote the other day while I was remembering my trip to Rome and how breathtaking everything was for me. It was my second time strolling through the streets of Rome, yet it felt like the very first time. From the train ride into the city, to the high arches of the colosseum, and the beautiful fountains filled with people’s hopes and dreams of love and a future, I felt infinite. What I find interesting about all those things is that it is so easy for people to put their faith about love in a fountain, or tell strangers about their problems, but it is so hard to share the burdens we go through everyday with those that are closest to us. Why is that? What does that say about us as humans? We live our days pretending like we are fine, yet most of us are carrying the weight of our struggles on our shoulders.

It was amazing to walk through those ancient streets and to look up at the art and history that surrounded me, and to think that those same people that left their legacy went through similar struggles that we have today. Why does society tell us to be perfect when we know it is something we will never achieve? All I know is that we were never meant to walk this life alone. Life was never meant to be easy. What does history show us again and again? It shows us that we are broken people in need of a savior.

I have always been in love with history, art, and culture, and being in Rome again enhanced every part of that love.

I took this picture when it was 90 degrees, humid, and my feet filled were with blisters in so much pain, but in this moment none of that mattered. I was ecstatic because I love discovering new cultures, traveling the world, and knowing that my life is just a spec of time that should never be taken for granted.

Today as I was sitting at a coffee shop remembering everything that made this day beautiful, I began to look back on the day and everything that I missed while I was too busy worrying about our ship leaving us. I can look back now and say how thankful I am for Europe’s public transportation because without it, I would of been so lost. I can admire the great artwork in every major cathedral/historical building because it’s not everyday that you can look up and see a famous unique painting done several hundred years ago, and overall I can admire the beautiful memories acquired with my family while being in a completely different country.

Rome is a city of love, and adventure, art, and history, and overall, new beginnings.

Nostalgia

After spending almost two months in Europe, coming back to college and reality just doesn’t seem right. It seems like a lifetime ago that I was riding a donkey through the narrow streets of Santorini,  free diving in the caves of Capri and Positano, and getting lost in the magical streets of Venice Italy. Maybe it’s just my wandering heart that is desperate for new adventures, but the fact that class and homework is my reality now almost feels wrong. I find myself constantly scrolling through Tumblr and looking on Instagram at people’s traveling experiences and it makes me remember all my amazing memories over the summer. I guess it’s not really socially acceptable to quit college to become a professional world photographer and blogger, but a girl can dream right?

Growing up sometimes sucks. Society expects something from you, professors expect something from you, work expects something from you and it’s so easy to fall in the lifestyle of pleasing people. What I’ve started to learn as I’ve been growing up is that people are always going to want something from you. The small things that we don’t appreciate now are going to be the major details we wish we could enjoy years from now. Life is a celebration! The fact that God has given us a chance to choose him everyday should be motivation enough to change the way we perceive life.

I went home the other weekend and my mom and I ended up going paddle boarding A.K.A. (our favorite sport besides snowboarding). It was the most amazing experience to paddle out in to the ocean and to just sit there and meditate on creation. Everything about that moment was beautiful and perfect in my eyes. Thats when it hit me, we as humans are going to constantly strive to reach goals in life, but we’ll never have this same exact moment twice. We forget that our lifeline is a short one, and before we know it, we’ll be regretting those chances we never took. Work and school consumes us and we never know which breath will be our last. As a college student striving to stay afloat in school and work, I am learning to just enjoy the experience. I’ve come to expect that I am never going to be perfect, have it all together, or always do the right thing, but I am learning to be confident in the fact that we never were meant to be perfect.

For now, I will be content in where I am at in life at this very second, because today is the oldest I’ve ever been, and the youngest I will ever be.

Seas the Day

As I take a momentary break from my travel diaries I wanted to talk about our everyday struggles. Sometimes life gets hard, and sometimes it seems unbearable, but sometimes you have those moments that make you thankful for every goodness this world has to offer. Lately, as I have been packing for my second year of college, it seems like it’s tougher; yet easier to leave home this time around. At this point I’m experienced  in saying my goodbyes, having friends that are more like family, but I’m also old enough to be thankful for family and home cooked meals. The other day I went on an adventure with my cousin and it was by far the best thing I could of done before going back. Sometimes all you have to do is travel far to reencounter who you are. It’s so easy to forget amidst all the chaos of our everyday lives. We went snorkeling down south and found our private little cove. It was so amazing to forget about the outside world and to become one with the waves. We got lost for hours exploring the reefs and caves.

I find it funny how when I was growing up I used to hate the beach. I hated the sand that stayed between your toes, the salty hair, the tan lines, but now it’s all I ever think about. Maybe it’s because I go to school in a place where the ocean is no where to be found, and now I know what to appreciate. I don’t even mind the long drives or the traffic (maybe a little bit). I don’t mind the salty hair or the uneven tan lines. My point is that sometimes we have to leave our place of comfort in order to figure out what we truly do love. We’re bound to make mistakes in life, but if we learn to focus our energy on the good this world has to offer maybe, just maybe we won’t miss what life is supposed to be all about.

You Know Me

He Knows Our Hearts ~

Today I sat in a coffee shop for hours inspired yet at a loss for words. To think that the creator of the universe knows each and everyone of us by name. It’s so easy to get caught up in life and our everyday problems. I think it’s so crazy how the simple sentence “How are you?” can really break the walls people put up. For the longest time I have dealt with my problems silently, always hiding the truth from those who actually cared. I thought that people didn’t really want to hear how broken I actually was. Is it so crazy to think that life was never meant to be done alone? Why are we pretending to be okay with our struggles when we’re not? Why are we giving society the “perfect impression” when people were never meant to be perfect? The hardest part for me was to understand the fact that God wants us how we are. He wants our hearts, he wants our complete surrender. We come before God as broken vessels, yet he calls us beautiful. I think that once we begin to comprehend the love of the Father we start to love people. We start to act like Jesus would act, we begin to build community.

God has really been showing me this season of my life how putting our faith and trust in people is always going to falter, but how putting our faith and trust in Him will be the answer we have been praying for. We shouldn’t be running to our Father when life is falling apart. It should be an everyday relationship that builds trust and shows love. A relationship that overall portrays the same love and grace we are shown by Him through His Son Jesus.

Coming home from college was much harder than I expected. I was so used to seeking God in my everyday life that when I got back home it was weird to have someone else take care of me again. Going away to college in a different state really tested my faith and pursuit towards Him. When I moved to Phoenix last fall I had no church, no family, and no community to become a part of. It was in that time that I really leaned in to God the Father. He knows the desires of our hearts, and is longing for a relationship with his Beloved. Traveling has opened my eyes on how blessed we are in America. There are people dying to know the name of Jesus. People who are broken, killed, taken, and all for a faith that we are shown in freedom here in America. To look at the eyes of children that are beaten and mistreated by their own parents all for money. People have asked me a lot “If their is a God then why is there so much suffering in the world?” Honestly I have no right answer because I don’t know everything, but I do know that God is the same yesterday, today, and forever. 1 Corinthians 1:18-21 says; 18 “For the message of the cross is foolish to those who are headed for destruction! But we who are being saved know it is the very power of God. 19 As the scriptures say, “I will destroy the wisdom of the wise and discard the intelligence of the intelligent.” 20 So where does this leave the philosophers, the scholars, and the world’s brilliant debaters? God has made the wisdom of this world look foolish. 21 “Since God in his wisdom saw to it that the world would never know him through human wisdom, he has used our foolish preaching to save those who believe” (NLT). Every time we see someone who is homeless, suffering, or broken and our hearts break, how much more does God’s heart break over His children? When we feel moved to give money to the poor, love on people, or simply smile at someone who is having a bad day, it is God working through us. We can’t begin to understand who God is, but we do know that God’s grace and mercy endures forever.

It hurts me to think that I complain about the minor details when there are people that have less than I, yet have so much joy. When we look at the cross and what Jesus did, it gives us a different perspective on life. It makes you want to go and share the Gospel because of how it has changed your life. It makes your heart break over the lost. It makes you want to read your bible for hours just to get a glimpse of who Jesus is. It makes you want to quit your addictions because you realize your worth in life. It makes you want to love those that hurt you over and over, because someone loved you enough to forgive you at your darkest. It makes you want to get up and do something for your faith. It can be as simple as stopping, looking up, and listening to what He is saying to you.

Whatever it is you are going through in life, whatever trials that come your way, know that HE KNOWS YOU. He knows your past, your present, and He knows your future. He knows our deepest fears, and what makes our hearts happy, and he is longing for a relationship with us. As I continue in my walk with God I am learning how to find a peaceful balance on how I lead my life with Him guiding my paths.

Firenze/Pisa – Florence/Pisa

La Bella Firenze ~

It was my very first time in this beautiful city and it was even better than I hoped for. The streets were filled with music, and art. It was such an artistic environment that I felt right at home. It still amazes me to see how something so simple like art or music can bring people from different cultures together. I think the best part about Europe is the public transportation. The fact that you can go from one city to another in a matter of minutes is mind boggling. We took the train from our port to Florence and it was a short half an hour.

Firenze / Florence 

Ever since I was a little girl, art and history has always captivated my attention. Maybe that’s why I enjoy traveling so much. I long to see and to experience new things. The fact that cities are old enough to show us through ruins how people used to be just fascinates me.

“A piece of art is a compact form of the universe.” – Unknown.  This explains what I feel when I look at art, listen to music, or travel to a different place. The fact that God in His very essence created us in His image just blows my mind. If we are creative, and artistic, and we get it all from him, then how much more creative and artistic is He? The fact that humanity has evolved over time to who we are now is proof that there is a God watching over us.

I snapped this picture because it amazed me how art students from the University of Florence do their projects. Who needs a canvas when you can use the ground? It inspired me so much to walk around and see the many artists thinking outside the box and being creative.

Florence is also known for its cheap authentic leather. You can imagine in a group of all girls how amazing that sounds. So we spent the rest of our time in Florence shopping till we literally dropped.

La Bella Pisa ~ Pisa Pisa Pisa!

If you should know one thing about Italians is that they are very expressive in the way they talk and move their hands! I love Italians. You can be a complete stranger yet they treat you like family. After Florence we ended up heading to Pisa Italy. Since it was my second time in Pisa, I wasn’t as obsessed with all the dorky pictures everyone takes holding, or (kicking) the leaning tower. I did however have to get the right kicking picture (which still wasn’t good enough) so I settled for something simpler.

Torre di Pisa

The second picture is my favorite because you can get an idea of how every tourist poses for their pictures.

I’m pretty sure I had gelato three times that day, as well as both pasta & pizza. Italians are probably nice because they eat carbs all the time. Carbs make me the world a better place. After  a long day of losing my mother twice in the crowd, shopping till I literally could not carry Any. More. Bags. and stuffing my face with carbs, we headed back to our ship awaiting our next grand adventure.

Monte Carlo

Monte Carlo is an amazing city. It’s literally like walking into a fairytale filled with expensive cars, famous celebrities, and beautiful French people. We arrived on July 4th early in the morning and took two trains to get to Monte Carlo, Monaco. It was about 90 degrees and with humidity that easily became way hotter; even though, we were only there for five hours total.  It was pretty cool to see the casino where James Bond and countless other movies have been filmed; the first casino where I can legally gamble and drink (none of which I did). It was beautiful to see the French Riviera and to be a part of something I have only ever dreamt about of since I took my first french class back in the 9th grade.

Even though I was the only one in our group to mildly understand and speak French, I loved being in my element. We ate french fries, window shopped in the most expensive stores known to man, and had some pretty life changing crepes while overlooking the beautiful French Riviera. Different country, different language, someplace where nobody knows my name or my story. I just got to enjoy life and forgot about all my responsibilities back home.

In this picture we were already exhausted, super sweaty, annoyed with the humidity, and in desperate need of water. Looking back at this memory I can only help but smile because of the crazy adventures we had that beautiful day.

Life on the Go

Hello World!

So after being 6 weeks away from home, taking 12 airplanes, living out of a suitcase, running on very few hours of sleep, and taking several thousand pictures later, I am finally home!  There is something about being in a different atmosphere that is always so calming to my soul. I started this blog because I long to share my beautiful experiences and the moments that have taken and continue to take my breath away; above all else I want to share how God has influenced my perspective on life through travel.